In my last blog about my 10 favorite things, I mentioned the Fly Lady. After receiving the daily e-mails for a couple of years, and dibble dabbling on the website, I finally decided to take a more serious look. Last Wednesday, I bought her book Sink Reflections and finished reading it yesterday. All of this information is on the website http://www.flylady.net/ but it was nice to sit and read it all from a book. You know me, I'm a sucker for a book.
I'm definitely not a Negative Nelly, in fact I strive to see the positive in all things. However, when it comes to "hype" in general, over anything really, I'm always a little skeptical. Or at least I take it with a grain of salt, cautiously. So when I started looking into the Fly Lady (a.k.a. Marla Cilley) and her system, I doubted it would work for me. I assumed I'd be bogged down with rules and too much structure. (Although I love structure and would even admit as far as to craving it sometimes, I also hate feeling obligated to it. I need my freedom.) But one thing I always remember is the "definition" of insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
I knew what I was doing was not working, so what have I got to lose by trying something different?
I guess I should back up a little and explain my internal dilemma. I stay at home with little 2 year old Joshua. He goes to preschool for half a day on Wednesdays and Fridays. Because we have Home Group at our house on Wednesdays, I spend that Josh-free time cleaning downstairs. By the time Friday rolls around I'm exhausted and just want to take a nap while he's at school. In between the regular life stuff, being mommy, cooking, counterbalancing constant clutter, the laundry would get done here and there. (Scott has done most of it for a while now.) And let's not even mention the condition of the whole upstairs. No one goes up there, so why should I stress about cleaning it? Ha!
Well, the truth is (relating back to that yearning for structure comment earlier), the mess and clutter cause a huge weight on my shoulders. It puts me in a bad mood! And really, that's just not a good excuse to snap at my family. I always tell the story about my days in corporate America. My old boss said to some of my co-workers (on more than one occassion) that she was frustrated by their desk and that she wants them to stop and organize everything exactly the way I had it. If you walked into my home, especially upstairs, and ESPECIALLY my home office, you'd think that whole story was a big fat lie! Why can't we do things for ourselves that we can do for others?
So back to Fly Lady. I decided to give it a try. In 7 days, I have kept my sink shining :), made my bed each day, washed-dried-folded-put away all the laundry, cleared the two clutter corners of our bedroom, actually scrubbed my master bathroom floor, and much much more. And no, I'm not exhausted and burned out. But MORE than the obvious visual results, I love Fly Lady's philosphy behind it all, that I'm not behind, I just need to start where I am. I laughed through much of the book because there are so many principles and life-skills that I've been taught already, in Mary Kay. But again, I didn't think to apply them to myself. The biggest relief is letting go of the guilt that I'm a bad wife and mom because I can't keep this house under control. It's ridiculous really. I wouldn't think that of anyone else in my shoes, so why blame me?
For a split second yesterday I had the fear of "what do I do when the house is clean and there's nothing left to do?" Isn't that crazy? First that it would be a fear, Ha! and second that I would ever think I'd not have something to do. Hahaha! I do however, look forward to a place for everything and everything in its place (or its tossed!). I really need a stress-free (clutter-free) home and most especially as this year progresses, as I get bigger with this pregnancy, and of course when he/she arrives.
So, I'm excited. Excited for the progress made in a short time, and for what's ahead.
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